Learning the Ropes

August 26, 2010 at 8:08 AM | Posted in I have MS., I learn from my mistakes., What's up? | Leave a comment

A little over two weeks ago I switched to Copaxone as recommended by my neurologist. It differs from Avonex in many ways but the most important to me (right now) are administration method/frequency and side effects.

Copaxone is injected every day, whereas Avonex was once a week. I am having some difficulty getting into a routine with daily shots. You’d think it’d be easy, right? A friend asked me, “Isn’t it easier than remembering a shot once a week?” Turns out, no. I have off Wednesdays so Tuesday nights it was so easy to remember, No work tomorrow, shot tonight. I have decided to take the Copaxone in the evening, which is not the time of day that I have ever taken medicine on a regular basis, so it is a struggle to remember. I’m getting better about it, though, and have only completely forgotten once.

Copaxone is a subcutaneous shot, whereas Avonex was intramuscular. This means a MUCH smaller needle that I don’t even feel going in most of the time. There are more bodily locations I rotate through and most are different than where I used to inject. I still need Bill to administer some of the shots if I am to use all of the locations because I can’t (easily) reach some of them. I can do the shot manually or using an automatic injection device. We’ve both tried both injection methods and are still deciding which we prefer — each has it’s pluses and minuses.

Copaxone’s main side effect for me is a reaction at the injection site, whereas Avonex’s was flu-like symptoms. I thought I would mind that less but, um, not so much. I could treat the flu-like symptoms pretty successfully with OTC pain relievers and extra sleep, especially once I got the hang of what to expect. These site reactions are a harder beast to figure out, though. At first I just had a little burning and a bee-sting feeling for about 15 minutes; ice helped that some. Now I have redness and swelling that lasts beyond the initial sting and carries on as itching that can’t be scratched (too painful). Tuesday I stayed home from work because I had several injection sites that looked and felt like huge hives — I was driven to complete distraction by it. The good news is that I can do some things to tweak my injection preparation and technique in an effort to quell the reactions, which is exactly what I’m doing. I’d rather not go the trial-and-error route but I don’t have much of a choice here.

Copaxone’s manufacturer, Teva Pharmaceuticals, offers a program called Shared Solutions.* It is a network of resources for MS patients on Copaxone and their caretakers. Shared Solutions sent a package of information and an instructional DVD, set up a training nurse for me who came to our house and showed us how to do the injections, and had a specialist call after I started the injections to ask if I needed anything (which is how I got a nifty travel case for the medication + supplies). Shared Solutions was my first call with questions about the site reactions, and a nurse there talked me through some possible reasons and ways to help. They are poised to put me in touch with another Copaxone patient who can offer support as well; I am not taking advantage of that (yet).

SPACE

*Biogen Idec, the makers of Avonex, offered a similar program too.

The Second Week of July 2010

July 11, 2010 at 8:08 AM | Posted in I have MS., I learn from my mistakes., What's up? | 2 Comments
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Dear Readers,

I spoke to my neurologist about this current relapse. I told him about my tingly feet, how the numbness was moving up my legs, and how I was tired and feeling sad. He said the prognosis was still good since my symptoms are mild and only sensory, asked if I was taking Zoloft (I am) or feeling suicidal (I’m not), and said that we should do something to try to make the disease less active. To that end I am switching from Avonex, a once weekly intramuscular injection, to Copaxone, a daily subcutaneous injection. Depression and fatigue are common in MS, so those might go away if we keep the disease in remission. Depression is also a side effect of Avonex, so it’s possible that some of my meh-ness might go away when I change meds. I will continue to take Zoloft for the foreseeable future because…well, why not. Better to be safe than sorry (or sad). Overall, the doctor is still very optimistic and said that he thinks there is nothing to worry about.

Even though we didn’t go on a family vacation, I ended up staying home from work this past week anyway. I was in no state to function properly there. Not a day passed that I didn’t need a long afternoon nap — 1 1/2 to 2 1/2 hours — and my thinking was not consistently clear throughout the day. I did try to do a few things so as not to exist solely as a lump on the sofa and, well, let’s say the results were mixed.

Activity: Unraveling a sweater
Position: Seated
Accomplishment: Wool yarn gathered to be used later in the construction of a Christmas stocking.
Unintended consequence: Tired arms — like, more tired than when I spend all day at the keyboard. Had to break up my unraveling sessions to give myself some recovery time.

Activity: Cleaning an area rug with soap, water, and a scrub brush
Position: Kneeling
Accomplishment: Pet smells eliminated (hopefully) so as to discourage future use as an elimination location when the dog just can’t hold it.
Unintended consequence: Realizing how many spots were discolored on the rug from my trying to clean it in situ — the pet stains were gone but the bleached spots from my previous attempts to eliminate them were horrible. Decision to purchase to new area rug.

Activity: Volunteering at the Felege Hiywot Center for two hours
Position: Mostly seated
Accomplishment: Made an incremental difference in the lives of a few kids (hopefully) by teaching them about the wonders of scientific investigation.
Unintended consequence: Not feeling totally awful physically, likely because I spent the time sitting down in a cool room. (I expected to feel like total crap by the time the class was over but I took it easy, medicated, hydrated, and did okay.)

Activity: Shopping for a new area rug on-line
Position: Seated
Accomplishment: Purchased a rug that I think will serve us well. Caught a sale on an already-reduced price, got a rebate, and snagged a free shipping code.
Unintended consequence: Spent much more than what I thought I would when I started shopping.

Activity: Decluttering and reorganizing computer files
Position: Seated
Accomplishment: Slightly simplified our filing system. Cleared out a bunch of unnecessary files.
Unintended consequence: Screwed up the finely-tuned system that Bill had going in iTunes. Attempted to rectify that and made it worse.

Activity: Spray painting a brass chandelier that I purchased on Craigslist
Position: Standing and squatting and bent over
Accomplishment: Completed the first coat of white, which completely covered the awful brass.
Unintended consequence: Colored my nose hair white.

Activity: Photo shoot for Angie’s List article
Position: Walking and posing
Accomplishment: Media exposure…?
Unintended consequence: TBD

Activity: Checking in with work on my laptop
Position: Seated
Accomplishment: Went through my inbox and answered e-mails, placed requested orders (since I am in charge of inventory for my department), updated my time sheet, kept current on training, blah blah blah.
Unintended consequence: Felt worse about not doing more instead of feeling better about doing something. Started having The Sunday Funk on Friday in anticipation of the culture shock of returning to work on Monday.

I’m having a harder time with this exacerbation than the first one even though the symptoms are basically the same. I don’t know if it’s because the weather is hotter, I am not remembering that first one accurately, or I have become significantly wussier since the fall. Emotionally, though, I am doing better now than I was a week ago. That’s something.

Hugs and kisses,
Sacha

Who feels rotten? That’s right — me!

July 2, 2010 at 8:08 AM | Posted in Anna is my step-daughter., Bill is my husband., I have MS., What's up? | 1 Comment
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Dear Readers,

Well, the time has come: The first time I get to really disappoint my family* thanks to my stupid disease. Another relapse has begun and I’m just not up to the road trip we had planned for next week. Vacation canceled!

In all honesty, I think it’s turning out for the best after all. Sure, Bill and I had our minds set on being away from work, but we can cope. I’m actually a little relieved to get the time back because I’m embarking on a high-visibility project at work and I could use the prep time. Bill will take a day off  from work and take Anna to Kings Island, which is probably the only part of our road trip she was really anticipating; this is also a relief to me, as schlepping around all day in the heat riding amusements that make me want to vomit, or sitting alone while my family does, is hardly appealing. Anna isn’t enrolled in camp next week (since we thought we would be on vacation) so most of the time she’ll be hanging out with my in-laws in scenic Brazil, Indiana, which she and my in-laws enjoy.

This relapse is similar to my first exacerbation’s symptoms. My feet are tingly and/or numb all the time, the tingly-ness/numbness is moving up my legs, my energy level is low (and totally wiped out with the smallest of activities), and I’m not right in the mind (sad, unfocused, etc.). It’s a trifecta of SUCK. I have no motivation to do anything and, when I do, it’s uncomfortable to stand and, if I do anyway, then I’m completely exhausted after no time at all. So I try to do things that involve only sitting but I can’t hold serious concentration for any amount of time so that doesn’t accomplish anything either. Which leaves me feeling lazy and guilty, which makes me sad, which starts the whole thing all over again. Blecchh.

I don’t mean to sound totally pitiful. I know my symptoms are quite mild compared to what some people go through. I understand the power of positive thinking on attitude and I should look at the bright side more often to help me get through the day. It’s just that I’m not used to this yet…and I’m trained to feel guilty about things that are out of my control…and I’m scared.

<sigh>

Well, maybe I’ll feel good enough for a family getaway later in the summer. Or later in the year. Or maybe we’ll do something else altogether. Something even better than what we had planned for next week. We love lemonade!

Hugs and kisses,
Sacha

SPACE

*This is the story I tell myself, as Sandy would say. In reality my husband and step-daughter are sweet, supportive, flexible people who understand that life throws us curve balls once in a while.

#worldmsday

May 26, 2010 at 8:08 AM | Posted in I care about strangers., I have MS., What's up? | Leave a comment
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The last Wednesday in May is here, which means World MS Day is upon us. You knew that, right? This will be my first World MS Day since my diagnosis so, predictably, I am totally unprepared. I’m not sure what I think I should be prepared for but I definitely feel some pressure to support any sort of MS awareness/treatment/research/cure movement. It’s self-induced pressure, yes, but that makes no difference whatsoever.

I’m not planning a get-together at the house with food and drink and educational literature. I am not soliciting charitable donations. I am indeed using the appropriate hashtag in this entry’s title so it gets picked up in Twitter, so that’s something. And I am telling you this: life with MS is unpredictable.

I don’t have some of the terrible symptoms, like blurred vision, weak limbs, pain, loss of balance, or incontinence. My disease is relapsing and remitting, not progressive. So far the treatment is worse than the symptoms most of the time. Yes, I have less energy than I should. Yes, the medicine depresses me. But the scariest part of having multiple sclerosis, for me, is the fact that I just don’t know what’s going to happen. There is no way to predict how the disease will alter my life and that’s hard to think about sometimes.

So here’s my very-small-scale PSA to you: Learn something about MS, more than the teensy bit that I share with you. Check out the National MS Society and the Multiple Sclerosis International Federation. Get involved in World MS Day. Think global and act local.

Avonex Shot #21

May 19, 2010 at 8:08 AM | Posted in I have MS., What's up? | Leave a comment
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Dear Readers,

Yeah, so, I’ve been taking Avonex for a while now. This is likely my last “Avonex Shot #”-titled post as it already seems a bit ludicrous to track it that way now that I’m on 21.

Not much has changed about taking Avonex in the past few months. I stopped giving myself the shot and let Bill do it each week; knowing I can do it myself is good enough, no need to continually prove it. The side effects are a teensy bit better than they were in the last update but, at the same time, I think I’m getting the hang of managing them successfully. I still laze about on Wednesdays but that might be because that’s what I’m used to now more than anything else.

I still have some residual numbness from my last exacerbation. I’m starting to wonder if it’s permanent nerve damage because I don’t have the other symptoms that came along with this relapse at first, plus it’s gone on so long now.

As far as the sadness goes, that got a bit worse for a while. The neurologist changed me from Zoloft to Prozac at my last visit and…well, it didn’t go so well. I noticed a change for the worse in the first month but I gave it a try for a bit longer. No good. My mood was off, I had a much harder time facing work, management of my responsibilities at home slipped, my sleep pattern was screwy, and I just didn’t feel like myself overall. Bill said it was like I wasn’t here while I was here and I think that’s a succinct way to sum it up. I have recently changed back to Zoloft and I’m starting to feel better. I don’t know if I should see changes this fast — placebo effect? — but I definitely feel more energized about things that need my attention.

I have been trying to incorporate a little more physical activity into my day as I get back to normal. Sometimes I walk on the treadmill, sometimes I walk to the park for lunch, sometimes I do some work in the yard or run errands. Bill and I also tried the South Beach Diet and lost a little weight. I’m down 25-30 pounds overall since the beginning of the year but at least half of that came from eating less and walking on the treadmill before I started the new diet. We are much more lax about sticking to the diet now but I do like eating better and feeling healthier.

The doctor was not nearly as impressed with my calendar of data as I thought he would be. Maybe he’s not an overly expressive fellow. Whatever. I still write stuff down although the pages look a lot less full now that various changes are tapering off.

The MS is losing its novelty. I don’t want to write about MS-related topics on the regular. I don’t want you to think about my disease when you think about me. I guess I’ll just have to be interesting in other ways…

Hugs and kisses,
Sacha

Avonex Shot #8

February 24, 2010 at 8:08 AM | Posted in I have MS., What's up? | 1 Comment
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Dear Readers,

I’ve been taking Avonex on Tuesday evenings for about two months now so I thought I’d give you an update. Firstly, I’ve bucked up to giving myself the shot. Bill still handles it when I am using my upper arm for the location but I have successfully administered the shot to myself in each thigh, both front and side. Secondly, the side effects are getting better. I have to take less pain relievers to manage the achiness, the nausea and fatigue aren’t as bad, and I don’t feel like somebody beat me up all the way through the next evening. I do get an unrelenting headache for a day or two but I’m not sure that it’s 100% because of Avonex. Thirdly, I am more productive on Wednesdays with each passing week but I am still not back to normal. I find that I can’t really do well without a nap at some point during the day but I don’t know how much different that is from any day, really.

As far as the MS goes, I am in the midst of another exacerbation. It is not serious but it is real and that means I’m not dealing with CIS any longer. I was surprised that it happened again in only four months’ time and took it pretty hard at first. It probably didn’t help that I started to read more about MS at the same time (from the Multiple Sclerosis for Dummies book that Bill keeps in the bathroom) and became a little overwhelmed with information. I’m back to my usual level-headedness (ha!) but I know that these meltdowns will come in waves for a while as I cycle through the grieving process.

As far as the sadness goes, I think the Zoloft is helping. It is hard to tell for sure but even a placebo effect yields results. I don’t know where I’d be if I weren’t on it but I know where I am now, and that place is good.

I started exercising more in an effort to build up my stamina, mainly by walking on the treadmill in the morning before work. This had been giving me a little more energy and possibly contributing to some weight loss — I gained 30-40 pounds since last spring, putting it on very quickly without explanation and then maintaining the gain for several months, but I’m down 10-15 pounds from that now — but I had to stop. When symptoms started indicating another exacerbation, the cardiovascular exercise began to have the opposite effect: I was totally wiped out. I also noticed that regular activities made me more tired than normal and my baseline energy level is lower than usual. This bothers me quite a bit. I don’t want to feel sluggish all the time, I don’t want to have to “manage my energy bank” (as the book calls it), and I’m frustrated with the inconvenience of it. Blecchh. The right thing to do is pay attention to how much activity I can handle in a period of time and adjust my expectations accordingly…and I will do that…but I don’t have to be happy about it.

I have been keeping track on a calendar when I get my shot, in what location the shot is given, how I feel on a daily basis, what sort of exercise/activity I participated in each day, and anything else that might be relevant to my physical condition (e.g., when I get a massage, when I’m menstruating, etc.). This helps me see if there are any patterns developing. I also write down questions that I might have for the doctor since I plan to take the calendar with me when I see him. This is something the data nerd in me likes and feels good about.

I see the neurologist next week for my first follow-up visit since starting Avonex. I don’t expect any surprises but I’ll let you know if there are any. Probably.

Hugs and kisses,
Sacha

Avonex Shot #2

January 6, 2010 at 11:42 AM | Posted in I have MS., I learn from my mistakes., What's up? | Leave a comment
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Dear Readers,

Last night was my second injection of Avonex. Learning from the experience of my first shot, I did a few things differently. I took ibuprofen and acetaminophen around 7 PM, which was way before I planned to get the shot, so that I would have time for another dose of each before bedtime. This turned out to be a good call: Bill gave me the shot around 8:30 PM* and I did okay until the next dose of pain relievers at 11 PM. I slept through the night like a log and woke up at 5 AM with no more than a headache. Okay, that still sucked, but it was better than full blown flu symptoms. I took more pain relievers in the morning and then walked on the treadmill for 40 minutes, which I have been doing all week. So far, so good. After Bill and Anna left for the day, I went back to sleep for a few hours — unplanned, just knocked out on the sofa watching a movie — and then took acetaminophen when I was on my feet at 10 AM. I still feel a little wiped out so I’m glad that I have Wednesdays off this year.**

Update: I felt a little sluggish all day long and then, around 7 PM, my joints started to ache. I took more pain relievers and laid down for the rest of the evening but that was unexpected. Maybe I should have been medicating all day…? I’ll try that next time.

What does the Avonex do for me? I realized that’s probably not clear to y’all. What it’s shown to do is make my MS attacks fewer, work against the growth of lesions on my brain, and slow the progression of the physical disability associated with my MS. Those are the reasons why I’m taking it, why I deal with the side effects.

Speaking of side effects, the Avonex has a tendency to cause more than flu-like symptoms. The other main side effect is depression. I was worried about this one. I was on the edge of clinical depression before, then came the diagnosis with its vagueness and its life-plan-changingness, then came a treatment that causes sadness, “and it’s winter!” said the doctor at work yesterday — “a perfect storm,” he said as he wrote me a prescription for Zoloft. I’m going to try to head this one off at the pass. I spent the last week of the year off from work just sitting around the house not motivated to do anything, even though I made a nice list of projects to tackle, and I don’t want to find myself in June thinking Wow, I haven’t felt like myself all year. I should’ve done something about that. I’m on it.

Hugs and kisses,
Sacha

* Anna watched me get the shot last night. It was her choice and I’m glad she did it.

** My line management was kind enough to allow me to shift to an 80% work schedule this year. I don’t know what I’ll do with that extra day off yet but I’m certainly glad that I have it available.

Directions to our Hotel:

From Terre Haute / Western Indiana:
I-70 East to exit 68 for Ameriplex Parkway South. Stay on Ameriplex Parkway South to the 1st light. Turn left on Exploration Drive and then left again on Hatfield Drive. Follow to the end.From Indianapolis / I-465:
From I-465 take exit ramp 9B to I70 West. Take I-70 West to exit 68 and follow the Ameriplex Parkway south exit to the 1st light. Turn left on Exploration Drive and then left again on Hatfield Drive. Follow to the end.

From Washington St. and Ronald Regan Drive:
Go south on Ronald Regan Drive. Continue south on Ronald Regan and it turns into Ameriplex Parkway South when you pass over the interstate. (I-70). Stay on Ameriplex Parkway South to the 1st light. Turn left on Exploration Drive and then left again on Hatfield Drive. Follow to the end.

From Plainfield at 267 and Washington Street:
Go South on 267 to I-70 West.Take I-70 West to exit 68 and follow the Ameriplex Parkway south exit to the 1st light. Turn left on Exploration Drive and then left again on Hatfield Drive. Follow to the end.

From Kentucky Ave. / Highway 67 / Mooresville / Martinsville:
Take Ameriplex Parkway. Traveling west on Ameriplex Parkway go to the 3rd light and turn right on Exploration Drive. You will then take the 1st left on to Hatfield Drive. Follow to the end.

Time to Start Treatment

December 31, 2009 at 10:20 AM | Posted in I have MS., I learn from my mistakes., What's up? | 2 Comments
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Dear Readers,

In case you’re not caught up, I have MS. Well, technically I have high-risk CIS, but let’s not split hairs.

The doctor recommended in late November that I start treatment right away.* Bill was on board with that. I was initially somewhat hesitant.** I decided to start with Avonex and left the office that day with a packet of information from Biogen Idec, and by “packet” and I mean “binder”.

The pharmaceutical company has a pretty slick program for people starting treatment with Avonex:

1. A case manager gave me a call and spent some time talking to me about the drug, educational resources, the support network available, and the free sample program that I was being enrolled in. He took my insurance information and said that the company would look into all the details to get me this drug the most affordable way possible (which is handy, since the retail price for this treatment is about four grand per month). He also mailed me a package with a DVD instructional video on self-injection and a handy-dandy (and totally unnecessary) aid for gripping the syringe.

2. The pharmacy called me and a pharmacist talked to me about the drug — storage, administration, side effects, etc. She mailed me a shipment of four pre-filled syringes, which were my month’s supply of free sample to get started. She also let me know that a nurse would call me to schedule injection training in my home. Then she transferred me to an Avonex case manager, who made sure everything was going well.

3. The nurse called to schedule injection training. Then she came to our home, spoke to us about the drug (storage, administration, side effects, etc.), covered what to do in an emergency, answered any questions that we had, walked Bill through giving me the first injection, and then stayed around for another 15-20 minutes to make sure I didn’t go into anaphylactic shock.

My first injection was last night. I’m guessing it was about 6:45 PM when I got the shot. Mindy the Training Nurse told me to take something to ease the flu-symptoms side effect, which I did around 7 PM. Bill kept asking me how I felt and, truth be told, I felt okay — a little queasy, with a bit of a headache, but nothing that some ibuprofen and acetaminophen didn’t remedy handily. We watched some TV and went to bed. I was thinking This isn’t so bad after all.

Then the pain relievers wore off like clockwork around 1 AM. I woke up trembling from the chills, struck with involuntary stretches and other muscle movements, terribly achy, sick to my stomach, with a stuffy head — you know, just like I had the flu. It was rotten. Bill got me another dose of pain reliever and held me until I fell back to sleep, quaking with discomfort until the medicine kicked in. I took more pain reliever when I woke up this morning just in case the spell wasn’t over.

Here’s how I plan to improve in the future: Take the first dose of pain reliever early enough the evening of the shot such that I can have another dose before bed, hopefully eliminating the waking-up-in-the-middle-of-the-night bit. Then take another dose as soon as I wake up in the morning. Oh, and do the injection on an evening where I don’t have anything important the next day.

All of the experts that spoke to me about the side effects (doctor, pharmacist, nurse, etc.) told me that the flu-like symptoms should get better over time and may completely go away after about six weeks. Let’s hope. That sucked.

Hugs and kisses,
Sacha

* “Right away” to me meant “before your next exacerbation” but to Bill it meant “NOW! NOW! NOW!” The fact that a month went by before I actively started the treatment had different significance to each of us based on our underlying perspectives. This was a good lesson for me in understanding and sympathizing with my partner’s stress about my diagnosis.

** How sick would the flu-symptoms side effect make me feel? How sad would the depression side effect make me? Should I choose a non-interferon drug? Would I be able to give myself a needle all the time? Should I choose a longer IM needle given less frequently or a shorter sub-Q needle given more frequently? What if I didn’t have another exacerbation soon? Ever? WHAT IF?

Unexpected Turn of Events

November 13, 2009 at 10:39 AM | Posted in I have MS., What's up? | 3 Comments
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Bill and I were working toward becoming a one-income household. It was slightly frightening in a what-will-happen, can-we-really-do-it kind of way but I found the idea very exciting. I was looking forward to days ahead where I could really take care of myself, Bill, Anna, the dogs, the house, etc. — you know, focus all of my energies on that instead of half-heartedly giving it a shot at the end of the workday or workweek. I anticipated what it would be like to cook, clean, plan, exercise, blog, and otherwise handle the everyday without being tired, sad, or angry from the stress that my job outside the home gives me. Yes, we would have much less money coming in, but I was hoping that would be a chance to simplify our lives, discover what really matters to us, and challenge our resourcefulness. We had started to plan for when it would begin, what our expenses would be, how we would handle changes to our schedules and responsibilities and, most importantly, medical benefits.

See, medical benefits are a big deal in our house, as they are around the U.S. Bill lost his job at the beginning of this year (thanks, U.S. economy!)  and with it his medical coverage. Since that left him and Anna without insurance, and Anna’s mother wouldn’t add the child to her plan, and the cost of private plans is prohibitive, Bill and I married in February so that I could add him and Anna to my plan. The plan I have is provided through my employer. If I were to quit work then I would lose access to this plan — well, there’s COBRA, but that costs nearly twice as much as the mortgage to cover the three of us — and we would have to find an alternative. Bill did find work and was in the process of using his employer to access insurance but this new place of business is too small to get the kind of plan that I get for the price that I pay. We were cautiously optimistic about finding medical coverage with a price that wouldn’t make us choose between food and medicine with only one income in the future.

And then life threw us a curve ball: I have been diagnosed with multiple sclerosis. Well, technically I have been diagnosed with clinically isolated syndrome, which is MS that isn’t yet multiple, but I am going to start treatment for MS. Which means that I am going to have expensive medical bills and am likely uninsurable when shopping around for a new plan thanks to a pre-existing condition. Which means that my dream to quit my job and become a home manager has been dashed — woe is me.

Let’s look for the silver lining, shall we?

  • The diagnosis came while I was still gainfully employed and therefore in possession of (1) a nice paycheck and (2) medical coverage that has no lifetime coverage limit or pre-existing condition clauses.
  • The diagnosis came during the benefits enrollment period at work. That means that I was able to choose an insurance plan, a vacation plan, and a flexible spending account amount that will make 2010 much more do-able in light of this new wrinkle. Had the news come just a few weeks later then I would have made much different choices, which would have made 2010 more difficult to bear.
  • This abrupt change of plans has given me a kick in the pants to research other options with my employer, whether it is part-time work, change of department, or change of focus altogether. Maybe having MS will help my career, who knows.
  • This sudden coming-to-terms with the state of my health now and in the long run is motivating me to seriously think about making exercise and good food a priority in a real way. Wouldn’t it be ironic if, looking back, being diagnosed with MS was the starting point to a much healthier life for me?
  • The diagnosis came now, when I am married to a wonderful partner, and not at any previous time in my life. Knowing that I have Bill by my side going forward has always made the future much less scary and it helps now more than ever before. I am so lucky to have a loving, caring, compassionate husband.

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